Where's the magic?

As I juggle the mail between 4 different dating sites, I realize that I don't even know what I would do if I tried to date all these guys. I am wondering, what is the point? Slap my head, of course! Now, I remember--you have to you have to climb a lot of mountains, no--wade through a lot of lily pads, closer--kiss a lot of frogs, that's it! Only I don't want to really kiss any frogs. I just want to email a few times, have coffee, and move on, unless something really special happens.

That's where the magic comes in. The thing is, will you realize it at the time, or only after the fact? Will I miss it when it happens? The last time magic hit me, it knocked me over, flat out (and my glass of wine, too, I might add). And when I picked myself up, I realized that this was someone whom I knew practically nothing about. This, from a woman who last married a childhood friend. The comfort factor wasn't even in the room. And that was the initial intrique. But the playfulness and sense of humor were there, sitting right next to me. By the time I saw his eyes twinkle in the darkness of the bar, I had to see where this would lead.

Turns out, it got even better. But then complications set in. When you find magic, but you don't really know someone, how long does it take before it is a "relationship?" Especially, if you are not sure of what the other person really wants. And what happens to all those other dating partners?

I now had a situation where I was really lost. I wasn't sure if I should stop dating everyone else when the magic guy wasn't. What happens when I am faced with that? Which of course, I probably was. It wasn't going to be Romeo and Juliet for me the way it was with my Randy (I am 4 years a widow). It was more like Juliet wishing Romeo would show up Saturday night. I know, ridiculous on my part, but it was my magic fairytale, right?

So, now I am, on one hand, pursuing the fairytale, and on the other, exchanging emails and dinner with some nice guys (and a few frogs). The frogs I don't mind saying no thanks to, but with the nice guys, things are harder. I really hate to disappoint people, and dating more than one person requires disappointment on someone's part eventually. So, that is where it is now. Do I risk heart breakage with only one, or do I continue to seek out magic where I can find it among the many?